Erik and Gerik on MSN
by Princess Of Texts Ongoing
Summary: New completely random phanphic, written by me and a friend via MSN during one long summer holiday. Heavily edited, sorry if it's hard to read, please tell me if that is the case. Rated T. Please read and review! Oh, and Kate is me, Kat is my mate :


Erik was plaiting his new catgut Punjab when...

_Gerik enters room, looking smug_

_Kate follows_

Kat who appears from the kitchen with waffles...

_Kate runs over to get one_

_Kate: is munching_

But finds them stuff with arsenic meant for Gerik

(Erik's orders)

_Kate: collapses, foaming at the mouth_

Gerik: stares

Gerik continues to stare

10 mins later...

_Gerik: is a prize plum_

Gerik: oh my god!

_Gerik: finally twigs_

Decides 2 perform CPR

Kate: mysteriously comes to from CPR

Kate: snogs Gerik for 2 hours

_Kate: is v.v.v. happy_

Me and Erik watch

_Gerik: is bewildered_

Erik: Doesn't she need to breathe?

_Kat: ..._

Kat: wonders if Erik is getting ideas...

Erik: starts humming

Kat: decides he is definitely getting ideas

Kat: meh

_Kate: winks at kat_

_Katie: mouths 'go for it!'_

_Gerik: huffs_

Gerik: breathes

_Gerik: is being squished_

Kat: is snogged

_Gerik: pushes Kate off_

Kat: faints

_Erik: gives CPR_

_Kat: wakes_

_Kat: faints again_

Kat: looks mischievous

_Kate: looks sadly over at Gerik, who is standing in a corner, looking moody_

_Kate: sits on own, looking forlorn_

Kate: shows a little bit of cleavage

Gerik:...

Gerik: stares

Kate: moohaha

Kat: thumbs up

Erik: continues to snog

_Kate: sits forlornly_

_Kate: fiddles with blouse_

Gerik: continues to stare at cleavage

_Kate: starts to sing_

Gerik: stares at cleavage

Kate: is pissed

Kate: slaps Gerik

Gerik: stares at cleavage

_Kate: moves off to other part of room_

Kate: finds Punjab around waist

Kate: is pulled towards Gerik

Gerik: growls playfully

Kat and Erik: yet to surface

_OMG Kat I'm worried!_

lol

_Kate: looks angrily into Gerik's laaaahhvely eyes_

You kissed for 2 hours

_hee hee_

_No, I'm worried about your sick mind!_

hehe

Gerik: stealthily pushes Kate's skirt up

Gerik: is slapped again

_OMFG!_

hehe

Me evil

_is seriously worried_

_heh heh_

_Let us continue_

I can be worse

_... don't_

moohaha

Waffles: have gone cold

Kat and Erik: still snogging

Kate and Gerik: snogging

Everyone: is happy

_Kate: pushes Gerik away_

_Kate: thinks Gerik is playing mind games_

_Kate: is no longer happy_

Kat: knows Erik is playing mind games

_Kate: moves off once again to other part of room_

_Kate: sings to self again_

Kat: tries 2 go comfort Kate

Kat: finds Erik in the way

Kat: wrenches mouth from Erik's

Kat; can now breath

breathe

_heh heh_

Erik goes off to sulk

gerik: is sulkin

kat nd kate; hehe

_Kate: is still singing_

Kat: joins in out of tune

Kat: stops singing

singing

Kat: learns how to spell

Kat and Kate: decide to make some more waffles

But not tell the boys

_Kat and Kate: go to kitchen_

(is funny describing Erik and Gerik as "boys")

_heh heh_

_'tis_

Kat and Kate: make a mess

Kat and Kate: decide they need Erik's help

Erik: appears

_Kat and Kate: are splattered with waffle mix_

Gerik: offers to lick it off Kate

Kate: is freaked

Gerik: is slapped. Again

_Kate: declines offer_

Kat: struggles to resist Erik, how is humming as he cooks

Kate: slaps Kat and gives her earplugs

Kat: at

who

_Gerik: remains sulking in corner_

Gerik: sing ponr

_Kate: unwittingly allows her eyes to stray over to Gerik_

Kat and Kate: simper

_Kate: loves that song_

So does Kat

_Kate: is excited_

Erik: glares

_Kate: casually wanders over to Gerik_

Kat; tires

tries

_Kate: begins to sing Christine's part_

Kat; is stopped by Erik

_Erik: is immensely jealous_

Erik; wonders if it's childish to chuck waffle mixture at Gerik

Erik: frankly doesn't care

_erik: chucks_

_Gerik: is covered_

Kat and Kate: retreat from kitchen

_Kate: sidles over and offers to guard the bathroom door while he showers (lock is broken)_

_Kate: has a dirty mind_

Kate: is turning into Kat

_hahahaha_

_I'm not as bad yet_

Erik: asks for sponge bath

Kat: refuses

_Jesus_

refuses

_You say I'm bad now!_

lol

_Kate: guards door meekly_

_Kate: is egged on by Kat_

Kate: peers in on naked Gerik

Kate: faints in happiness

_Kat!_

_That is so naughty!_

hehe

_I wasn't going to have that happen!_

Like I believe that

_Kate: regains consciousness_

_Kat_

_You talk like a 21 year old!_

_I never thought you were like that lol_

Wise beyond my years love

_Lolz_

_Oooh_

_Me too_

_Sometimes heh heh_

_Like a white speedo swimming costume_

_Anyway_

_Let us carry on_

_Shall we scrap that bit?_

Erik: thanks Kate for speedo idea

Erik; puts 1 on

Gerik; will not be beaten

_Kate: has to avert eyes_

THE SWIMSUIT CONTEST

_Kat: doesn't bother_

Erik and Gerik; parade around in speedos

Kate and Kat; cannot decide whether to avert eyes or not

kate nd kat; stare

_kate: quickly averts eyes_

_Kate: is not as bad as Kat... as long as she isn't being egged on by Kat_

Kat; sees Kate peek around her fingers

_Kat_

Kat; raises eyebrow

Erik and Gerik; get bored

_We leave_

_Kate: is bright red with embarrassment_

Erik and Gerik; try to get Kat and Kate into bikinis

Kate and Kat; refuse to wear bikinis

Uh huh

_oki_

5 mins later:

_Will have to re-read at some point_

lol

Kate and Kat: are in bikinis

Kate and Kat; have no memory of how they got into bikinis

Erik and Gerik; look v happy

_Kate: runs to bathroom_

_Kate: barricades door_

Back in 5

Kat: is back

Kat: is freaked that Kate didn't know she was hopeless romantic

Kat; realizes she is still in bikini

Kate; still barricaded in bathroom

Kat; runs to bedroom;

Kat; thinks better of it and runs to kitchen

Kat; wonders where Kate is

_Kate: whispers fervently 'I'm in here'_

Kat; wonders if Kate has learnt ventriloquism

_Kate: wonders wrong_

_Kate: whispers 'bathroom'_

Kat; runs to bathroom

Kat and Kate; barricaded in bathroom

Kat and Kate; need to think of revenge

Kat; send in the Raouls

Kat; hehehe

Kate; does not like idea

Kat; puts on brave face and pretends to simper over Raoul

Erik; glares

Kat; glares back

_Kate: cowers_

Kate; will not be Raoulified

Kate; simpers over the Persian

Gerik; pouts

_Kate: looks longingly at Gerik_

Kate; but is still pissed

Kate; will resist

_Gerik: catches Kate's eyes, and winks_

kate; melts

_kate: then glares_

gerik; pouts

Kat; finds Raoul dead in her arms

Kat; will not be defeated

Kat; simpers over Philippe who has mysteriously risen from the dead

Kat; cannot spell Philippe

Kate; has disappeared in a poof

Kat; is a little freaked now

Kat; is surrounded by the Persian, Erik, Gerik and Philippe

Kat; ...help

Kate; helps Kat battle out of closing ring of Erik, Gerik, Philippe and the Persian

Who from now on shall just be called Persian

now

Kat; wonders if she actually wanted to be saved

Kat; meh

Kat and Kate; re-retreat to bathroom

_Kate (to Kat): what do we do?_

Kat; it's your turn for ideas

Kat; has an idea

_Kat and Kate: look around_

_Kate and Kate: look at each other_

_Kat and Kate simultaneously: WHAT DID THEY DO WITH OUR CLOTHES?_

Kat; is pissed

_Kate: is too_

Kat; has a v good plan

_Kate:..._

Kat; we attach a playboy to the end of a fishing rod

den lock dem all in da kitchen

Then order a pizza and let the smell waft

Moohaha

_Kate: ... what is a playboy?_

Kat; jaw drops

_Kate: looks worried_

Kat; every heard of FHM?

_Kate: yes_

_Unfortunately_

Well playboy is the magazine they all aspire to become

_Oh_

_Uh... right_

_Kate: has look of dawning comprehension_

_Kate: OH!_

Kat; slow claps

_Kate: but what do we do about our clothes?_

der probs in da bedroom

_yeah_

_They probs wanted us to go there_

But if they're locked in the kitchen, it should be safe to retrieve them

...hypothetically

_Ya_

Well, let's try the plan anyway

Playboy and fishing rod: appear

_Kate: ..._

Kat; I not as normal as first appears

_Kate: ..._

Kat; shall we just try plan?

_Kate:... oki_

Men; ooooo...Jordan!

_Kat and Kate: roll eyes_

Plan; a success

Kat and Kate; sneak into bedroom

_success_

_Dahhling_

..Shut up

Clothes; on far side of room

Kat and Kate; run to pile

Clothes; are not ours

Clothes; resemble Chicago ones

Just shorter

In all directions

_Kat and Kate: look at each other worriedly_

Door; slams

Erik and Gerik; in room

_Kat and Kate: those sick son of a..._

kat nd kate; underestimated erik nd gerik

_Kat and Kate: are red_

_With embarrassment_

Kat; is worried bout what comes next

Kat; oh dear

_Kate: is worried too_

erik nd gerik; produce pujabs

silk punjabs

Kat and Kate; resist urge to faint

_Ewwww_

_Bondage_

_Kat and Kate: are very, VERY worried about the two boys' motives_

Kat; insists that if Erik HAS to be kinky with a silk Punjab, then she's having HER clothes back

_Kate: is too worried to speak_

Erik; gives her boob tube and short shorts

Kat; taps foot

Erik; grumbles

_Kate: is still incapable of speech_

Erik; gives spaghetti sleeve top and figure hugging peddle pushers

Kat; meh

Kat; best I'm gonna get

katie; speechless

gerik; grins

katie; snaps outta it

Kate; you too jackass

Gerik; glares at Kat

Kat; would like Kate to participate in story

_Oh_

_Sorry_

_Kate: is waiting_

_Kate: receives leather corset and suspenders_

_Kate: slaps Gerik_

Gerik; is slapped

_Kate: yeah, I said MY clothes_

Kate; next time it'll be in the balls

Kate; but with a knee

...or a stiletto heel, your choice

_Gerik: scowls_

Kat; gives him the finger

_Kate: hi-fives Kat_

Kate; receives clothes identical to Kat's

_Kate: scowls_

_Kate: is that the best I'm gonna get?_

Kat; uh huh

_Gerik: unless you want the corset back..._

kate glares

_kate: okay, okay!_

gerik; protects balls

hehe

_kate: rolls eyes_

_kate: uh... A little privacy, guys?_

_Boys: remain where they are_

_Looking eager_

Are both slapped?

V hard

Kat; DONT MAKE US TAKE OFF YOUR MASKS!

Boys; scarper

_Kate: uh... what she said!_

_Kat and Kate: hi-five_

Girls; change v quickly before they come back

_Kate: okay, let's find our REAL clothes_

Incinerator; smokes

Kat; bugger

Ah well

_Kate and Kat: noooooooooooo_

_I was about to suggest that, great minds think alike lol_

Better than a corset and a boob tube

_Lolz_

_Ya_

Boys come in looking kinky

kinky

Girls; find silk pun jabs around their waists

Girls; are pulled towards boys

Girls; meh

_Btw_

_What ARE the boys wearing?_

...lets not think of that

_... Good idea_

Probs the speedos

...ew

Kat; find self in Erik's arms

Kat; tries to resist

_Kate: is writhing madly, trying to escape_

Kat; change back into Don Juan costume and then I'll melt

Erik; runs off to change

_Gerik: how 'bout you put on the Aminta one?_

Erik; comes back with Aminta dress

_Kate: is worried_

Kat; bit more covering than what we're wearing now

Kat; shoos boys off as girls change again

_Kate:... yeah..._

_Kate: doesn't this show WAY too much cleavage?_

...rather have your corset?

Kat: changes

_Kate:... good point_

Kate; changes

Boys; come just to late to see us changing

Boys; are disappointed

Girls; end up boy's arms

Boys; cheer

Up

Yo? Kate?

_Hey_

Girls; are snogged

_Kate: is looking worried again_

_Kate: is snogged_

Kat; has melted

_Kate: tries to wriggle away_

_Kate: fails_

kate; watches kat nd erik in horror

Kate; noooo! Kat! Resist!

Kate; is too late

late

_Kate: looks worried again_

_Kate: will get worry lines_

_Kate: decides to stop looking worried_

Kat; does to seem to be breathing

Erik; notices

Kat; surfaces

Kat; gasps for breath

_Kate: is now cooperating fully with Gerik_

Lol

Erik; dives in for another kiss

Kat and Kate; are getting touched up

Kat and Kate; don't notice

Erik and Gerik; think they're in heaven

_Kate: realizes that she is being touched up_

_kate: knees gerik in the balls_

_gerik: groans_

Kate: rescues Kat

Kat; is v grateful

Erik; is kicked in balls

Erik and Gerik; now in lot of pain

_Kate and Kat: storm off in a huff_

_Kat: finds a piano_

_Kat: plays_

_Kate: sings_

Kat; starts playing poto

Kate; stares

Kat: what?

Kat; I can't resist

_Kate: shrugs_

_Kate: sings along_

_Gerik: comes over and sings his part_

Erik; starts singing Ponr

Kat and Kate; NOT FAIR!

Gerik; glares at Erik

_Gerik: starts to sings MOTN_

_Kate: goes over to Erik_

_Kate: is touched by an angel of music. Lots_

Kat; is v jealous


End file.
